Hockey

Growing up, hockey was my life. I didn't start until I was 7 which meant I was 3 years behind everyone else and the one tripping over the sticks I was supposed to jump over and skidding into the boards I was supposed to avoid. On top of that I perfected the backwards non skate and the flutter slap shot. For most people, that would have been enough of a sign that basketball's a good sport too, but I just couldn't quit, I loved the game that much. The universal smell of the rink, the crisp air on my face, the electricity felt from of a tape to tape pass and the euphoria of a shot in the top corner. As a kid, I didn't even care if we won as long as we played. As time passed others disagreed. Winning was the point and pasting people into the boards drew the cheers. The last two years of my hockey career involved me kissing the boards and dreading the games. I quit, defeated at 15, and took up basketball instead.

17 years later, opportunity knocked and I was pleased to discover the electritcy had never left. Playing against guys who hadn't taken a break, the first few months nearly killed me but as time passed my legs got with the program and I began to remember how the game was supposed to be played. By the end of the season I no longer stood out in a bad way, well, not as often. This season is over but as long as my legs keep working, I'm hooked for life.

Speaking of hooked, is it just me or is the NHL 1o times faster and grittier then ever before. I've watched nearly every Canuck game and all the Caps/Penguins games and man, the speed, the passes, the hits, the shots. Its almost hard to believe the players are human and not some digitized game. Watching Ovechkin, Backstrom, Crosby and Malkin go head to head is mind blowing. I know I'm a biased prairie Canadian boy but I just can't understand how hockey, especially playoff hockey, isn't more popular. The TV ratings continue to suck in the US, even here in Canada, and it just boggles my mind. Granted, hockey has become more of a business in recent years but still the product is exciting if not addicting.

Angie for one, just can't get into it. She tries, but a few minutes pass before she's reaching for something, anything else to occupy her attention. I bug her asking sarcastically if she has a heart beat but she just smiles and says "they're all overpaid." I get it, I guess. But still, I can't help but think if we're Canadians, we have no choice. Hockey's in our blood. Its the one thing that unites us, no matter our race, religion, or political views. Yes, all the Canadian teams are out, but still, there's a ton of Canadians still playing, just on other teams.

I don't care if you love hockey, hate it or are so indifferent you almost didn't read this because its about hockey, I challenge each and every one of you to watch Game 7 between the Penguins and Captials tomorrow night. The game involves 4 of the top players in the world and they're all laying it out for one shot at the cup. Winner moves on, loser goes home. Every game leading up to this has been incredible, 4 have been decided by overtime. Ovechkin vs. Crosby. It'll be one for the ages! Some would even say ELECTRIC.

John

Hole in our Gospel

This past week Rich Stearns, CEO of World Vision came out with his first book. A Hole in our Gospel. Bill Hybels was so taken by the book he bought 10,000 copies and gave one to every family at Willow Creek. I bought 1 for my family and maybe you should too. Check out this inspiring video and the website for more info. http://www.theholeinourgospel.com/videos/

Here's what Bono had to say about Rich - "His form of worship is to be the eyes of the blind and the feet of the lame. Rich Stearns is much more than a powerful voice in the fight against AIDS and extreme poverty; he is an action hero."

John

P.S. In other news, 9 million children will die this year due to preventable diseases. As depressing as this reality is and as much as I try to insulate myself so I don't have to react, I find its good to be reminded every once and awhile.

P.P.S. Every penny Rich makes on the sales of his book go directly to World Vision reducing the above statistic.

Proud dad

My facebook status says I'm a proud dad. The good kind of proud. Here's why.

The big Ethan man joined Cubs this year, or Boy Scouts if you're Cubiliterate. The first few weeks was a fight to get him to go. He didn't know anyone, didn't know what to expect and he really didn't want to wear the uniform. Ethan's not a uniformy kind of guy. Anyways, we've kept him in and each week he's complained less and less (he's yet to recieve his uniform so that may be playing a role). Over time he's been crowned Champion of the annual Kub Kar Races and he's even made a Cub friend named Jake. When he first starting attending he'd say to me "Just so you know, I'm not gonna make a friend just to make a friend, besides we may not even end up living here so it would be a waste of time," -which. . .the boy's got a point, but what 8 yr old is that practical? Still he's come a long way and is graduallly becoming more people brave. Especially after this past weekend.

Last Tuesday at Cubs, they passed out forms for this Star Wars themed camp that was in 3 days. Not much notice I thought to myself but still the camp sounded amazing. I thought it would be too bad Ethan wouldn't be there. (it was 3 days long and an hour and a half away). Seconds after I made Ethan's mind up for him, he trotted up to me with the form and said "so, guess I got camp this weekend." Yes you do I said, trying to hide my shock.

When I dropped him off on Friday, he fought back tears a bit but finally composed himself, gave me a tight smile and said "see you in 3 days." Walking back to the car I had tears of my own inspired by an 8 year old who fought fear for the greater good. I had given one of his leaders my cell phone number and expected it to ring of the hook all weekend but Ethan didn't call once (even though I carried it everywhere). In fact I was the one who finally caved, calling his Scout leader. When he answered he was like" uh, he's having fun, so why don't you just let him have fun." I hung up a tad embarassed as I never thought I was "that" parent. When we picked him up on Sunday he was beating a girl mercilessly with his styrofoam Lightsaber which is noble, right. Guess he had fun I said to the Scout leader. ha. As we drove away, Ethan asked me why I was wearing suit. Truth be told, I was wearing jeans, crocs and a button up I got on clearance at Sport Chek which has since made me think I must suck at style. Wow. So bad.

Actually, speaking of no style, yesterday morning I walked out in what I thought was a pretty snazzy church outfit. Maddie looked up from her cereal and said "hmm, nice dad" and then quickly looked down. As we headed out the door I put on my crocs which I guess was too much because Maddie said "No dad, you can't. You can't wear Crocs with that outfit. Maybe if you wore jeans it would work." I looked down at my cream pants, white button up and newly wiped shiny black crocs and knew she was right. I changed quickly and was a little shamed by the stark relief in my 10 year old's face. Apparently my sense of style is unemployed too.

I could make this post even longer and brag about my other kids like how Maddie's taken up basketball with me, learning things like how Beef and picturing a phone booth can actually help your arc and I could even rave about Alexa and how in this entire 6 month adventure of unemployment she's never complained once about our cramped living arrangement. I could even rave about my wife, having to wait nearly a year before having a nest once more but that would take too long, so I'll just say it again. This time louder and a little bit prouder.

I'm a proud Dad. The good kind of proud.

John

P.S. Job hunt is going great. Prospects are really good. More on that soon.

Boyling over

I gotta be honest. I'm kinda ticked. Most of us have probably seen this by now. A unknown never been kissed 47 year old UGLY woman dares try her hand at singing. Reports have recently come out that she lied about never being kissed and has actually done some singing here and there. Still, people just couldn't believe their ears that an ugly woman could possess that kind of beauty. Ok, I'm human, I was surprised too but I guess that's why I'm so ticked. How have we digressed so far that the physical appearance of a person (especially a woman) is an immediate indication of their level of talent? As Susan began to sing everyone was SHOCKED, like, WHAT THE HECK? She can sing? But she's so ugly?? Its insane when you think about it. Still, most North Americans seem to function like this.

What really got my blood boiling is reading that Susan got a makeover. Poor girl. Obviously now that she can carry a tune she has to be attractive - especially if she want so be successful. I'm not ususally an angry sort of a guy but for some reason this got to me. Maybe its the injustice of it all. Either way, this has made me reflect even more on beauty in our culture and the implications for future generations, like Maddie and Lex for instance. What are we teaching them?

Before I leave you, I wanted to share this piece of genius satire written by the award winning comic writer Andy Borrowitz. His pieces frequently appear in The New Yorker. Remember its satire.

Enjoy! I always do.

- John

The success of singer Susan Boyle on the reality show "Britain's Got Talent" has caused both television networks and their viewers to reconsider the intrinsic value of ugly people, media experts say. In living rooms around the world as well as in the executive suites of media giants, those exposed to the Susan Boyle phenomenon are grappling with the paradox - thought impossible up until now - that an ugly person could be talented.

In New York, NBC chief Jeff Zucker confirmed that his network was "seriously considering" lifting its official ban against featuring unattractive people on the air."For years, the letters NBC have stood for ‘No Butt-ugly Characters,'" Mr. Zucker said. "We're beginning to re-think that."
Jenifer Genterson, a news anchor from Abilene, Texas, is just one of a chorus of beautiful TV talking heads who have been startled and inspired by the surprising presence of talent in an ugly person.

"In the TV business, we're told that beauty is everything," Ms. Genterson said. "But Susan Boyle has shown us that ugly people have the right to live, too."But Professor Davis Logsdon, who studies the rare occurrences of ugly people in the media at the University of Minnesota's School of Communications, warns that the isolated example of Ms. Boyle may give ugly people around the world too much hope.

"The fact is, only one in a million ugly people will ever get on TV," said Professor Logsdon. "Most of them will wind up in academia."Elsewhere, one day after lifting travel restrictions on Cuba, President Obama said he would send Vice President Joe Biden there for the next four years.

Ethan's the man!

Yesterday Ethan took his 6 inch home-made Kub Kar and calmly dispatched all the other Kubs. (not that I'm competitive.. .) He had 28 races in total and remarkably finished first in every single race. What a guy! He's currently in talks with Nascar.

John

P.S. A Kub Kar is a 6 inch wooden car with plastic wheels designed and fashioned by Ethan over weeks at Kubs (boy scouts). It cannot weigh more than 5 ounces and the judges take this very seriously, weighing each car before they race.

Surfin Schamaz

If a Surfin Dude can be white, hairy, have an inner flab tube around his waist and kneel rather then stand on his surf board, I was that Dude. Two weeks ago we headed to the miles of beach that is Tofino. Because that's what unemployed people do, that's why. We stayed in Ucluelet, 20min from Tofino because it was half the price yet twice the class (we discovered). We stayed at the Terrace Beach Resort, owned and operated by Jason Priestly himself. Sorry Aisling, the Reverend didn't make an apperance although apparently his father did. For what it's worth, JP made a wise career move because his places are booked solid and you see why when you walk in. Decked out in a rustic yet homey style complete with a TV/DVD inside and a hot tub on the deck. Most evenings were spent wrinkling up in the hot tub and watching the sun set over the ocean. (while in the hot tub)

We made the decision to go surfing the second day. There we stood, 10 clueless white unimpressives nodding cooling at the surfer dude "yeah man, 10 surfboards and wetsuits to go." As we left with our gear I asked him sheepishly where he suggested we change. He said "just change at the beach, that's what all the surfers do." After driving back to the resort we squeezed, yanked and finally stretched ourselves into our suits. Ever been hugged far too long? By a large someone? That's a wetsuit.

Arriving at the Ocean we grabbed our boards and headed for the beach. By the time we arrived at the water's edge we were all panting, heavy boards eh? We stood watching the force coming at us then spontaneously did the cool beachy run into the water trick. An hour later we were collapsed on the rocks having been beaten and battered by an unstoppable liguid rebel force. Surfing is like any sport, the pros make it look like any moron can do it. Well, I tried for 2 days and never stood up once. I did perfECt the kneel surf. Felt pretty proud. Felt even more exhausted though. Who knew lying on a board in water could feel like like summiting Mount Kilamajaro. So, besides surfing in Tofino, unemployment has been allright. Truth is, sometimes you just need to take the edge off. Relax. And who better to help then The Reverend, Mr. Priestly himself.

Its been awhile since I've written on this Crack, almost 3 weeks, so here's a schamaz of stuff I've wanted to comment on:

1. For the 3rd straight year my Edmonton Oilers missed the Stanley Cup Playoffs. There are few things I love more than watching my favorite sports team compete in the playoffs. They had the players but lacked the team. Maybe Mac T getting fired will be the start of something special. Am I still gonna watch? Yeah, the family on the island are huge Canuck fans so we'll be watching all the games together. I pick the Capitals to win it all but as a Canadian, I'll say go Canucks!

2. Somehow I'm always in the room whenever American Idol is on so unfortuantely I'm in the know this year. For what its worth, just give it to Adam already and allow Paula to finally park in that special zone. She deserves it. She really does.

3. I'm on EI, that's how we're doing it.

4. The past 5 movies Angie and I have watched have been incredible. Adaptation, Being John Malcovich, Road to Perdition, Doubt and The Reader (especially good). I'm not recommending these necessarily (unless you like them and aren't offended by any of the stuff)

5. Let Ovechkin celebrate however he wants, he deserves it. And your just jealous.

6. I'm in a family book club so I just finished reading The Grapes of Wrath. Steinbeck is a poet among other things. Besides that, I can't think of a better book for people to read in these times, you know, with our big recession and all. cough. Next book: A Complicated Kindness (another gem)

7. I'm currently exploring some exciting ministry opportunities out east. Its been far too long, I can't wait to get back in the saddle.

8. Ethan and I have been enjoying Cubs. Tomorrow we race in a city wide Cub Car rally. The little 6 inch home-made cars, you know the ones.

9. Maddie and I started playing bball together. She's a natural. Really is. Reminds me of myself when I was that age and a. . . girl apparently, should have thought that one through.

10. Alexa taught herself how to ride a big persons bike. One day she just went outside and the next thing I knew she was flying past the window. She's one of the bravest girls I know.

11. Angie continues to love and kiss and support her unemployed husband. Who could ask for anything more? ("I could, get a job why don't you ya bum?" - Love Angie)

That's good for now.

John

I no longer believe

Any promise of speed makes a fan in me. So, when the self service checkouts began popping up all over I was instantly touting their praises. I'd walk up to the overcrowded lines, look at all the unenlightened shoppers, briefly pity their plight then ninja into the SSC line. Minutes later my receit would spit out and I'd be exiting the store catching the sad glances of the shoppers left behind. Why can't they just believe. . . I no longer believe. I realize you can't base your beliefs on one bad experience but you can actually, people do everyday, especially as it applies to shopping. Here's what happened.

I had just finished shopping in a place I usually avoid due to ethical reasons and/or masses of people and I was walking up to the checkout lines when I spotted them. I had already been shopping twice as long as I planned and my small cart was bursting. Why do we use small carts when we know they're too small. Anyways, I entered the no line laughing hautily to my brother in law and wife. Angie began scanning the items as if she was being timed and I kept careful eye on the clock sensing a record was imminent. Then came the voice. "Please wait for assistance." What? Who said that? "Please wait for assistance." Wait? In the SSC? Panic began to set in. Just keep scanning stuff I blurted out. We have to do something. But our something didn't work. So we stood. That's when the arguing began.

Just cancel and start again. You can't do that. Well push that button then. Do you even know what that button does? Well, scan more stuff at least. It won't let me. Well forget this then, lets just take our stuff to the unenligtened tills. No, we only have a couple things left to scan. Yeah, but we could be standing here all day. Oh wait, a blue smock, someone's coming. What, they're just staring, like, not my problem I'm on my break. Oh, there's another, what? She's just staring at us too, staring!!!! And so there we stood. The unenlightened. Waiting.

10 pitying glances later a human being flashed a card and minutes after that we were on our way. Phew. Flashes of the movie AI appeared and I secretly prayed machines would never take over the world. Sure they're faster but. . .. humans are great, right, even in blue smock.

John

P.S. I was snuggling with Lex in bed this morning when she asked "Dad, what do you want to be when you grow up?" I celebrated thinking "she thinks I'm young." And then she continued, "yeah, dad, you really need to get a job." ha ha. I'm working on it.